Funnies

[EvilSpaghetti]

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?
Porridge.

How did the leper lose his head down the toilet?
Looking for his ass.

[Noxide]

• Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

[EvilSpaghetti]

Whats brown and smells of pine?
A turd in a Radox bath.

[Noxide]

patriotic.jpg...............

[SeaGoddess]

What's pink and fluffy?
Pink fluff.
What's blue and fluffy?
Pink fluff holding his breath.

[Noxide]

There once was a boy called Matty who didnt have a body, he only had a head.

Then it came to his 18th birthday, so his dad who felt sorry for him took for a pint down the local pub, Matty was very excited about having his 1st drink of alcohol , so the proud father came in and placed Matty down on the bar and ordered 2 pints.

Then the father poured the beer into Mattys mouth, and once he'd finished a body had grown onto Mattys head, so he kept drinking and by the end of the night he was a normal man, with arms, legs, toes and fingers, but Matty kept on drinking.

The lesson you should learn from this is to always 'Quit while your a head'

[Noxide]

Little Johnny once asked his teacher "Do hearts have legs?."

The teacher answered "Why do you ask that?"

Johnny replied "Yesterday, I heard my dad say sweetheart open your legs."

[Noxide]

READ AT OWN RISK. Contains offensive language

[EvilSpaghetti]

Duck.gif

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[Noxide]

Little Johnny sees his mother walk out of the shower and sees her vagina.

He asks her what it is and she embarassed replies, "Oh, that's mommy's black sponge."

A few days later, Johnny spills a glass of milk on the floor and says, "Mommy, I need your black sponge to mop up the milk!"

She replies, "I lost it, honey."

A couple of days later, he comes running up to her and says, "Mommy, I found your black sponge!" Mystified, she says, "Where, honey?"

Little Johnny says, "It's over at Mrs. Johnson's house, and Daddy's washing his face in it!"