Funnies

[Noxide]

I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

[Joshua_pohan]

The Ultimate Sacrifice

There is a brunette and a blonde hanging over the edge of a cliff off a piece of rope. They realize that the rope will break if one of them doesn't let go and they will both fall to their deaths. The brunette starts this big heartwarming speech about how she is going to sacrifice herself. At the end of the speech the blonde starts clapping.

[Lemmings]

Attachment 26107

[Noxide]

What did the 0 say to the 8?

Nice belt.

What's cheese that's not yours?
NACHO cheese!

[Lemmings]

What did the 0 say to the 8?

Nice belt.

[robynn88]

The one talking muffin is shocked that the other muffin in the oven is talking.

oh ic

Picture54.gif

[Lemmings]

A woman walks into a shop that sells expensive Persian Rugs.

Looking around, she spots the perfect rug, walks over and inspects it.

As she bends to feel the texture of the rug she farts loudly.

Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her 'little accident' and hopes a sales person does not pop up right now.

As she turns back, there standing next to her is a salesman. "Good day Ma'am, how may we help you today?"

Very uncomfortably she asks, "How much does this rug cost?"

He answers, "Lady if you farted just touching it, you're gonna crap your pants when you hear what the price is."

[Noxide]

Did you hear the one about the cannibal who passed the missionary in the jungle?

[Lemmings]

What do you call a man whose father was a Canon ?

A son of a gun !


What do you call a man with two left feet ?

Whatever you like - if he tries to catch you he'll just run round in circles !

[Noxide]

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. Bartender says, "What is this, some kinda joke?"