poems

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Originally Posted by SeaGoddess

I rate 8/10 yours. I'm not moved by love poems. Sorry

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dont worry:):):)

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Originally Posted by SeaGoddess

The deepest fog covered the land
Night was slowly reigning over.
Darkness blesses with his hand
The old, forgotten harbor.

A ghostlike ship arrives at shore,
The sand embraced it quickly
At distance, an evasive roar
Was echoing... yet scarcely.

It was a lonely soul unarmed
Calling an ancient name:
Forgot your hopes, they'll do you harm
Your fate will prove the same...


Sorry for the delay, the creation process requires time...

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I think "Forget" will be more suited to the penultimate line.
Anyway,it has almost the same theme as the previous one,but a good one nonetheless,so 8/10.

Thanks, it was an honest mistake :)

Antonio's last poem struck me as great and the other two as good.Overall,I think he deserves 8.5/10.I also think a neutral member should judge us (that is,excluding antonio,seagoddess and I).

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Originally Posted by SeaGoddess

Thanks, it was an honest mistake :)

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You are welcome.

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Originally Posted by rivster

Here's my edition:


Prelude to Life

On the seemingly endless path called life,
I trudge on,pursuing goodness;
Into turbulent waters,I dive,
Avoiding the unvarnished truth with a defiant face.

I know nothing of the truth I avoid,
Neither do I understand it's purpose;
I assure you,it can't be found in any tabloid,
It is not even known by the wise carcass.

Why,oh why can't I comprehend life's circle?
Why,oh why can't I figure out my purpose here?
All I know is that I have to trudge on with a story to tell,
and turn a blind eye to life's leer.



There,that's my entry.

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Rhyme suffers. Anyway, I love what you express. 8/10

Quote:

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Originally Posted by SeaGoddess

Rhyme suffers. Anyway, I love what you express. 8/10

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Thanks a lot!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rivster

Here's my edition:


Prelude to Life

On the seemingly endless path called life,
I trudge on,pursuing goodness;
Into turbulent waters,I dive,
Avoiding the unvarnished truth with a defiant face.

I know nothing of the truth I avoid,
Neither do I understand it's purpose;
I assure you,it can't be found in any tabloid,
It is not even known by the wise carcass.

Why,oh why can't I comprehend life's circle?
Why,oh why can't I figure out my purpose here?
All I know is that I have to trudge on with a story to tell,
and turn a blind eye to life's leer.



There,that's my entry.

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a solid 9.5/10 it was perfect but i personaly whould change the end:):)

THE SEMIFINALISTS ARE:

1-rivster with 9.5

2-antonio(me)with 8.5

3-seagoddes with8.0

whoooooo hoooooooooo:wow::wow::wow::wow:

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Originally Posted by antonio

a solid 9.5/10 it was perfect but i personaly whould change the end:):)

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WOW!!Thanks.and could you tell me how you would end it?Maybe,I could incorporate it in my next one.
What did you think of my suggestion of letting a neutral member judge our poems?